First Day of Teaching Tomorrow

 If there is one thing I  have learned about anxiety over the past five years is its ebbs and flows are not easy  to predict. I ma currently in a low anxiety phase, and in fact today my anxiety levels have been lower than yesterday. There is  plenty to be nervous about. Even in normal times, I would be nervous about my  first day of teaching at a uni with a reputation for being posh. What if the posh brats take the piss out of me? (I just listened to 'I have confidence' from the Sound off Music and felt better :-)). This would be my chief fear in normal times. Now, I also have to contend with the fear of having caught Covid from Betty, and having to teach without any IT support. To  kids traumatized by 18 months of home schooling during Covid. To be honest, all the other fears have taken the edge off the chief fear. I will heave a sight of relief when I wake up without a cold or cough tomorrow and everything else will be a bonus. Yes, the past few weeks have been nerve-wracking. But, tomorrow is a fresh start, a new beginning. I am not going to carry the baggage from the last few weeks into tomorrow. Yes, my anxiety  levels over the past few weeks have surprised me, but I was doing the best I can in challenging  circumstances. And, I am still here, I haven't thrown in the towel. Anxiety will come and go as it pleases, fate may trip me up, but that's not within my control and neither is it my fault.