Individual Responsibility vs Social Reform

 Today, I mentioned to my granny that I was trying to fly as little as possible to reduce my carbon footprint. My uncle responded that that wouldn't make a difference, which started the well-worn discussion about the best way to tackle the climate crisis--to encourage individuals to reduce their carbon footprint or to push governments and states to take action. The easy answer is both--this is a battle that will have to be fought on many fronts, etc. etc. But, let's go over the arguments for either. The doctrine of individual responsibility has  a murky history as it was propagated by oil majors to obfuscate their own role in the climate crisis. From a tactical perspective, pushing a doctrine of individual responsibility can open the door to charges of hypocrisy from bad-faith actors as almost no one can lead a carbon-free lifestyle in the today's world. At the same time, there is no chance that the world can support the current ecological footprint of our class if everyone in the world had our class' standard of living. And, surely, we cannot advocate for some (actually a lot) of people to lead less comfortable lives than us. That is not a morally sound position. So, a non-sanctimonious approach to individual responsibility is that one is simply preparing for a substantially less comfortable low-carbon future. Also, if one spurns individual responsibility, surely it becomes difficult to argue that people should stop flying in private jets? Why should filthy-rich individuals not be exempt from individual responsibility for the climate crisis? However, I do feel its not simply that we should do both individual actions and agitate for systemic change. Its that we cannot do one without the other. The consumption decisions of individuals  in aggregate drive the capitalist engine, but individual actions might not add but not quickly enough to cause systemic change by itself. But, creating a critical mass of people agitating for systemic change that is not eco-fascistic requires people to acknowledge that climate change affects people to different degrees as individuals and that the biggest polluters will have to make the biggest sacrifices. Creating a low-carbon world would entail a radical reimagining of our wants and needs (and the line in between) as individuals. 

Airport blog Dec 2023

 As per tradition, another blog as I wait for a flight to the airport. The past week has been a bit of a blur even though it does not feel like I did all that much. I had a job application to finish, interviews to fix (which I didn't manage to do), and a bad cold to contend with, even as I wrapped up teaching for the semester. I also didn't participate in any Palestine activism, partly because of my cold, partly because my mind was occupied with this stuff. But, I did spend a lot of time on Twitter getting worked up about events in Gaza. Since India sharply swung rightward, it has been a reliable fount of bad news on the political front. For the past two months, India has been supplanted by Palestine. Now, for the next five weeks, I imagine Palestine won't be uppermost on my mind. The struggle for a free Palestine, and all it symbolizes for people of, from and for the Global South, will be a long one and I look forward to rejoining it when I return to the UK in January. But, right now I am looking forward to a break from it. 

Irate Student At Office Hours

 I had an unpleasant exchange with a student in my office hours today. He was unhappy with his mark on a recent assignment and two of his friends and his mother agreed that he deserved a higher mark. I tried explaining my feedback to him, but he wasn't convinced. The conversation became a bit heated, but I managed to just about keep my cool. We were going around in circles, and I had a tough time getting off the call. He later wrote to me apologizing for the tone of our call and asking for guidance on how to appeal his grade while also seeking advice on how to do better for his next assignment. It just occurred to me how bizarre that is. Why seek the advice of someone whose academic judgement you don't trust? Maybe he jsut wanted me to put some advice in writing that he could brandish if his mark on the next assignment didn't satisfy him. After the exchange, I was a bit shaken so I wrote to a senior colleague asking for a second opinion on the assignment. I was confident that the assignment didn't deserve more than 2-3 marks more at best, and I would have increased the grade if my colleague suggested it. No one likes being bullied into raining marks, but beyond a point I can't be arsed. The colleague replied that it was impossible to second mark every and if I was confident in my grade I should leave it be. So, I decided to leave the student's email unreplied. And, I am glad to report that I don't feel as shaken by the incident as I expected. 

Double trouble

When I got home yesterday and turned the light switch on, nothing happened. My throat had been itching all day and I was looking forward to a peaceful evening. I mentally prepared myself to go early to bed as without power on a winter night, there is absolutely nothing you can do. Luckily, it was a minor problem which got resolved within 30 minutes. Today, with my throat still feeling scratchy, I was looking forward to an early evening after meeting some people over drinks. And, as I and another person from the group got on out cycles, I discovered that my front tire was flat. Not a good day for a flat tire, and home would be at least a 90 min walk away on a cold evening. I toyed with taking the punctured tire on the bus with me, and leaving my bike behind, but that would mean another trek tomorrow morning. So, I decided to op my earphones and drag my bike all the way home. The not-so-good thing about walking your puncture bike on a cycle path is watching cyclists with intact tires whizz by you. But, today that was not the only sight. A pair of runners overtook me and I saw that they were tied to each other by their wrists. Shortly, another similarly tethered pair overtook me and I saw that one of them had 'blind runner' and the other had 'Guide runner' written on their backs. That sight filled me with a warm glow. Its wasn't just seeing someone worse off than me on a bad day. It was seeing someone worse off living their best life. As someone born with poor eyesight, losing my eyesight has always been one of my biggest fears. SO, it felt good to know that even if I lose my eyesight, it needn't stop me from running. 

Poor Student Feedback

 I have been asking my unit directors to share student feedback in the hopes that I find some positive comments that I could include in a job app. Very few comments mention me by name, and there were some mildly positive comments. But, there was one that was decidedly not so--it said that my "teaching and presentation style were very poor and difficult to engage with". Ouch! I definitely won't be including that one. But, it does sting because this is the first time getting such a poor comment about my teaching. I don't consider myself a great teacher, and to be honest, for reasons that I won't be getting into right now, I haven't felt very motivated towards my teaching or research over the past few years. But, I have always thought of myself as an above-average teacher, even in my low-motivation phase. And, the bit about presentation hurts particularly badly since I am a former journalist and supposed to be a great presentation. In my defense, the unit that invited this comment, is not in my area of research, and I didn't get much guidance from the lecturer when creating the lecture content. I was not very satisfied with the lecture content, but couldn't be arsed to change it for the second year that I taught it. The good news is my low-motivation phase appears to be ending, and everyone needs a wake-up call from time to time. I have been coasting and half-arsing in this job for a while now, and eventually one has to buck up or find something else to do. I have decided to stick with this profession and buck up.