I am still getting used to first-world etiquette, or more specifically British etiquette. For instance, I wished an administrator in my PhD programme a Happy Easter without giving it too much thought. She is white and British and it didn't even occur to me to find out if she is a practicing Christian. After all, everyone in India wishes everyone else on Diwali, irrespective of their religion or lack thereof. Just because you are an atheist doesn't mean you can't celebrate Diwali. If nothing else, it is the annual family reunion. But my the woman in my PhD office responded wishing me a good break too. Her response struck me as being quite tepid, but I didn't give it further thought until I got an email from a faculty member which ended with him wishing me a good break. It is only then that I realized that it is improper to wish anyone on a religious festival if you are not sure of their religious views. This culture gives so much importance to not stepping on other people's toes that navigating it feels like dancing on a hot pan. You can't keep your feet down for too long for fear that you are crushing someone's feet. Is this one reason why English people are so reserved? I mean, of course, whiteness and the othering of coloured folk play a part but that is a topic for another day. When you are constantly afraid of offending the opposite person how can you interact freely with them?
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