What advice can someone who hasn't ever been in a long-term romantic relationship give someone who is in one currently? As much as I remind myself about this fact. I can't resist. A close friend today confided in me about some "developments" in her marriage and I gave her my advice. She hadn't explicitly asked me what I think, but its fair to say she was interested in what I thought. The other person she confided in, who is female and has been married as long as my friend, gave her the opposite advice, which is interesting. I definitely can't tell her what to do. All I can do is nudge her to think of all the consequences. The other thing that struck me is what a long way she and I, who had a similar conservative upbringing, have come in terms of our attitudes to sex and relationship. Growing up in a sexually repressed society is difficult to outgrow, and the people who are able to throw away all vestiges of shame and sexual repression are few and far between. Some of us will never be able to completely shake off that conditioning. But, at least we can try to understand it better and be more at ease with our sexual selves.
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