Today, I just couldn't work on my PhD, and around midday I had started to think that the day would be a write-off. I had tried reading up for my first week of teaching and couldn't get past the first page. S, with low expectations for the rest of the day, I decided to work on my article review after lunch. I thought it would be a slog, but I got rally immersed in it and the hours flew by. I only wish I could immerse myself into my PhD in the same way. My PhD writing has been so fitful and sporadic that writing every sentence feels like heavy labour. Maybe that's just the nature of the beast. I realize that I haven't lost my ability to write because I have managed to write motivation letters for job applications. No one prepares you for the demands that a PHD puts you on your patience and fortitude. But, I am glad to have some work outside my PhD since in the current circumstances I doubt I would be able to relax even if I take a break from my PhD. And taking a break without being able to relax only increases my guilt at not working. If I have other stuff to do, at least I can tell myself that I am not idling, just moving my plans around. If there is work to be done by a certain deadline, it doesn't really matter whether I do it 4 weeks or 4 days before the deadline. I always knew taking my mind off my PhD from time to time would help, so I have decided not to work on it at least until Monday.
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