How much of yourself can you be if the opposite person construes that as an invitation for flirtation or romance? When does mutual flirtation turn into sexual harassment? Obviously when one of the parties feels uncomfortable. But can that discomfort be expressed without damaging relations or other repercussions? Some people are better than others in setting the tone of their relationships and expressing discomfort. There are others who are more passive in setting the tone of their relationships. And, should a person who has suffered sexual harassment treat her harasser coldly in the future. And, if she doesn't, is that proof that she didn't really suffer harassment. Should she be in a permanent state of nervous fury and never ever exchange pleasant words with her harasser? In such matters, the dice is loaded against the weaker, or lets say, more passive party. The one who is prone to not rock the boat. Any action save anger towards her harasser is taken as proof that she wasn't really harassed. How does one establish boundaries if its not one's nature to be assertive? Or should they be enshrined in a workplace code?
Then, there are cultural differences too. An invitation for romance in one culture might just be banter in another. Again, this argument is often marshaled in defense of the harasser, who is usually a man. Cultural faux pas are less grave than sexual harassment.
I am aware I have asked more questions than answers, but such us the topic.
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