I'm back home a day earlier than planned for a lunch date with friends tomorrow, which might not materialize. I am trying to be sanguine about it, but I admit I am having a hard time. There is no conceivable reason why someone would play hard to pin down when it comes to a plan with friends they have known for about twenty years.The only explanation is different people have different norms for communication. I am someone who doesn't have a single unread email in his inbox and likes to respond to messages and emails immediately (Of course, the rules of dating communication are a whole different game --here, I am only talking about non-romantic contexts). I have friends who read a message and then respond hours later. I don't know how they remember to respond to a message if it is no longer flagged as unread but I am guessing they have a mental filing system which prompts them.
Different strokes for different folks, I guess. It is easy to interpret the actions of "evaders" as stemming from a lack of consideration. I am also aware that most people have a more active social life than I do. Since I am not a social person, I value my less frequent social interactions more and I am aware that that is not the case for most people. But, the way I see it is if you feel someone is constantly evading (not avoiding) you for no conceivable reason tell them if they are important to you. And, if they are not, make a conscious decision not to bother about it. Yes, since I am not very social, I won't have alternative plans if someone goes AWOL on me at the last moment. But, over the years, that has become less and less of a problem for me. I have also become more reticent about chasing people who are not good at keeping in touch without being bitter about it. Maybe it is age, maybe it is do with has happened over the past two years.
Different strokes for different folks, I guess. It is easy to interpret the actions of "evaders" as stemming from a lack of consideration. I am also aware that most people have a more active social life than I do. Since I am not a social person, I value my less frequent social interactions more and I am aware that that is not the case for most people. But, the way I see it is if you feel someone is constantly evading (not avoiding) you for no conceivable reason tell them if they are important to you. And, if they are not, make a conscious decision not to bother about it. Yes, since I am not very social, I won't have alternative plans if someone goes AWOL on me at the last moment. But, over the years, that has become less and less of a problem for me. I have also become more reticent about chasing people who are not good at keeping in touch without being bitter about it. Maybe it is age, maybe it is do with has happened over the past two years.
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