Loneliness Won't Kill You

 Gallons of ink are being spilt in the media about the epidemic of loneliness. Someone on Twitte called it a massacre, which I think is an exaggeration at a time when Israel  till a few weeks ago was masssacring Palestinians in full view of the world. The reasons ascribed to this epidemic of loneliness are smart phones, the design of urban spaces in late capitalism, the ease of accesing porn. Loneliness has been correlated with a  mutltiutde of negative outcomes including poor mental health and shortened life spans. All likely true. But, I also believe that loneliness shouldn't be treated as a phathology in the same league as cancer, or auto-immune diseases or  severe depression or bipolar disorder. Loneliness might shorten your lifespan (which is not an ambiguously bad thing?) but it won't kill you. How big a social cirlce you have is a function of many things, many of which have nothing to do with you as a person. By all means, one should try to build a community, but it often doesn't work. I am all for personal growth, and for introveerts such as myself to un-shell themselves. But, you can do all these things and more and still not have a community after years of trying. Maybe you are stuck in a small town. Maybe you have disabilities that keep you from socializing. Maybe you have been just unlucky in terms of the people who you have crossed paths with. What then? One might not be able to build a close-knit community and banish loneliness, but one can take steps to improve the quality of one's life.  I have written before about the way to allevaite loneliness is to seek company or seek a better quality of solitude. Back then, by solitude I meant long pensive walks in the evening. My definition of solitude now is mroe expansive. It is anything you do by yourself. The most solitude-improving step for me in the past few weeks has been to buy a TV. Sometimes loneliness is a message to chagen something about your life (if possible) but most times it is just something to be managed.