War Drums Fade

Its been an eventful few days on the geopolitical front. After India blew up some wheat fields in Pakistan, Pakistan fighterjets  lured their Indian counterparts into a dogfight and shot one of them down, capturing the pilot. Some of us peacniks felt that having one of our pilots in Pakistani custody would force the warmongerers to pipe but it was not to be. Today, news came in that Pakistan would be releasing the captured pilot as a "peace offering".
It seems like we won't be going to war, which is a big relief. Our rightwing government will inevitably paint this as a victory. I don't know if this will help or hurt their chances of reelection later this year, and I am too jaded to give it much thought. Trying to make sense of this crazy world is a fraught exercise. And, predicting what will happen next is a mug's game.

War

So, India carried out an airstrike in Pakistan, and irrespective of the damage caused, their ability to penetrate deep into Pakistan airspace is being touted as a victory. Pakistan says it detected the incursion and its own fighter jets chased the intruders away, who dropped their ballistic payload to make a quick getaway. From the Indian side, the estimated casualties range from 300 to 700. The strike obviously had the U.S.' blessing as Trump had warned that India was about to take a "very strong" step.
We may never know the whole truth about the number of dead/injured because it is in the interest of both sides to lie. Both sides want to play the provoked predator, not the aggrieved prey. 
The public discourse has become so jingoistic that pacifism isn't a tenable position anymore. It is all quite depressing. One can only hope that Pakistan continues to play it down and India stops foaming at the mouth and doing idiotic stuff like trying to kick Pakistan out of the cricket World Cup. But, with right-wing nuts in government in India, there is no guarantee that they will stick to the charade. They can be relied upon to stumble into a rapidly escalating game of strikes and counterstrikes that will end up in full-blown war. That might seem far-fetched. Direct wars between two large powers are messy, expensive and enormously disruptive to capital accumulation. But, we don't live in a textbook neoliberal/neoconservative world  any more and those rules don't apply. Who would have thought that the successor to that world order could potentially be worse?

Night Concert

Last night,  I attended my first music concert. It was an evening concert at a farm a few hours away from Mumbai and my friends and I opted to stay over at the farm. I had heard of the band that was playing, but I wasn't a big fan of them. That didn't change over the course of the evening, but the whole experience was worth it. It was more of a visual than an acoustic treat for me--especially watching people who were really into the music. A few years ago, the cynic in me would have dismissed them as wannabes, and I would have found the concert experience alienating. Now, I would like to think I am much less judgmental and open to other ways of being. And, that change showed even in my interactions with the people I had come with. There were five of us and I was meeting two of them after years. I hadn't hit it off with the two on previous occasions, which is why I hadn't bothered to keep in touch. Not that there was any hostility, I just felt I had nothing to talk about with them. But, this time around, things were different. I was able to interact with them in a much freer and open manner. Not that we will ever be fast friends, but the spectrum  of friendship is broad and accommodating, and they have found a place on mine.  

Leopard Trails

Today,  I went for a morning jog in Yeoor Hills and ended up at the same panoramic spot to catch the sunrise as last weekend, but with much more trepidation. Last week, a leopard was spotted in the parking lot of a mall in my hometown which isn't in close proximity to any forested area. And I was lurking in a wooded area on the edge of the leopards' natural habitat. Surely that was asking for trouble from leopards who seem to have become very brazen. It suddenly occurred to me why  I hadn't seen anyone else at sunrise point last weekend. Maybe they were keeping away out of fear of leopards, as leopard-man run-ins become increasingly common. I was in half a mind to skip the sunrise but it proved too difficult to fight the temptation since I was so close to sunrise point. Also, I had two men for company today so I felt safer. On my way down as well, I ran into a villagefolk gathering firewood at regular intervals. Since all the people I encountered were significantly smaller than me in stature, I felt that any leopard would go after them rather than me.
Is this how women feel when they are in secluded spots, except that they fear men rather than leopards? And, they do sigh with relief whenever they see another woman, as the sight of other humans relieved me?

Remains of the Day

Today,  I met a former colleague for lunch. He and another colleague used to be my post-lunch walking companions so we ended up spending a lot of time together. We didn't have much in common except our workplace but turns out that is enough to keep conversation going. Our jobs required us to be chained to our desks for most of the working day, so the walks were a good change. I remember feeling quite light and free during those walks. When our company went through a downturn and there were layoffs and troubling management changes, having people to whine and joke with played a huge part in keeping morale high. Even if we were on a sinking ship we would sink together.
The company we used to work with emptied out pretty quickly after I left. From around 20 people in Mumbai, now they are down to just two, one of whom is a former walking companion. News is a boom-bust business but it is still difficult to get used to the speed of the booms and the busts. I don't miss the business, but it taught me a lot and, on the whole, I enjoyed myself there. And I made friends that I am still in touch with.
One of my first blog posts was about ephemeral friendships--friendships that are a result of shared circumstances--and close friendships that are based on a resonance of personhood. Both not all friendships that develop in shared circumstances are ephemeral. Some lay deeper roots. Maybe because I am closer to colleagues from this particular company because that was my longest professional stint. Maybe because it was a period of rapid professional growth for me, and these colleagues were fellow travelers. Maybe they remind of me where I was and how much my life has changed since. Maybe all of the above.

Them and Us

Its been almost a week since a bus carrying Indian paramilitaries were ambushed by a car bomb in Kashmir, killing nearly 50. 'Patriotic' Indians quickly reacted--Bollywood sent Pakistani actors packing, portraits of Pakistani cricketers were covered up or removed and India may end refuse to play Pakistan in the cricket world cup. Obviously, I am disturbed by these events. The few Pakistanis I have met in England were indistinguishable from Indians. This is not a blog post about the politics or the political repercussions of terror attacks, especially so close to a crucial election.
My point of rumination is to what extent can individuals be held responsible for the (alleged) actions of their state. And, can one oppose the ban on Pakistanis while supporting the BDS (Boycott, Divest and Sanction) campaign against Israel as well as the apartheid era boycotts against South Africa. Yes, apartheid was the official policy of the South African state. Similarly, expanding settlements on Palestinian lands is the official (unstated) policy of the Israeli government. And the power differentials between the two sides are apparent.
However, I am not a fan of holding individuals accountable for the actions of their states. There is no state which doesn't have blood on its hands, although its true that some have more than others. But, is it reasonable to expect individuals to pressure their governments on threat of a boycott? Boycotts seem to only strengthen the chauvinists on either side. And, many people just want to get on with their lives. Political activism is not everyone's cup of tea. Does being born in a repressive state oblige  a person to take up political activism? Not all personalities are cut out for political activism and I don't believe that there is no other way to make yourself useful to the world and the people around you.

Ways of Seeing, Knowing and Telling

As my first research interview was ending, I tried to pump my interviewee for more contacts. He, as someone who seemed to love to toot his own horn, was reticent. I saved face by saying that I would contact him once I had honed my research focus, and could he please refer me to more people. He readily agreed.
Later, it occurred to me that I would possibly never be able to explain my research question to him. We come from different epistemological frameworks. One of the first things he said to me was that people from technical/engineering backgrounds are capable of mastering any subject, and asked me if I agreed. I was sure I didn't,  so I mumbled something incoherent. We have such different ways of seeing and ways of knowing that neither would he appreciate my analysis, nor would he see my topic as worthy of analysis. For instance, a journalist I used to know back in the day badgered me for a draft of my prize-winning paper as she was working on an article on a similar topic. I reluctantly agreed to send it to her and told her that I welcomed her feedback. I knew I wouldn't hear from her again and I didn't. She was looking for a straight paper on whether a particular policy move was good or bad and how good or how bad. None of that flaky post-modernist stuff (I am definitely not a post-modernist, but such distinctions are lost on positivists--who believe in a concrete knowable reality even in the social sphere).
It  is easy to lose heart when you are an anti-positivist in a field dominated by positivism. But, there are several advantages to it. Firstly, it makes you more open to new ideas and people since you are marginalized yourself. Secondly, it pushes you harder in your research and make it accessible and relevant to people who don't think like you do. Silos can be echo-chambers, as you are surrounded by people who have an interest in agreeing with you as there is a unspoken quid-pro-quo that you will agree with them. Maybe not on research findings but at least on the ways of seeing and the ways of knowing and the ways of explaining. Being among people who don't see and know like you can be bracing because it keeps you on your toes. Of course, they can also dash you to the ground if their criticism is mean-spirited, so it is important to choose your company well, at least when you are in the process of thickening your own skin.