Openness

Do people interact differently during crises? Do they dispense with small talk, put away their filters an talk more openly with  less fear judgement because who knows how long they or the opposite person will be around for? Do they censor themselves less, care less about what the other person will think? Some self-censorship is necessary of course because one doesn't want to hurt the opposite person. But, that censorship comes from a place of concern and not out of fear of  judgement. 

VE Day

Today marks 75 years since the War in Europe ended. Celebrations are muted because of the lockdown but it is a big occasion here in the UK. I,  of course, have mixed feelings as I see it as the last time white people killed each other in large numbers. Since then, their firepower has been directed at people of colour--Korea, Vietnam, Iraq, Afghanistan, various coups in Latin America. And more people of colour died in World War 2 than Europeans if you don't count Russia as part of Europe, which most Europeans wouldn't. Of course, history has been rewritten to make it seem as though the UK largely went it alone in the War and triumphed. World War 2 rhetoric and imagery was liberally used during the Brexit campaign, and even during the current pandemic.
I don't begrudge British people celebrating VE Day. Many of them possibly lost family members in the War and this is their way of honouring them. But, it is not a celebration that I would participate in. 

Anonymous Letters

I read an anonymous letter by a  married woman who was purportedly carrying on a nine-year-old affair with a married man. The letter went into a lot of detail  about how it started, the accompanying emotions, their equations with their respective spouses and almost trumpeted the fact that they had never been caught because they never left a paper or text trail during their trysts. Too much detail, in my opinion, to keep anonymity. Given that it was published in The Guardian and the couples seems to be white-collar and middle-class I find it difficult to imagine how their spouses or someone in their social circle won't come across it. I found myself wondering what was the point of the column. Was it to assuage guilt by trying to normalize adultery? Or was it a work off fiction? I imagine a newspaper of The Guardian's standard has some procedure to vet anonymous entries. I wonder how they do it.

Preparing for Coming Upheavals

One of my closest friends will likely leave the city within three months. I am obviously not feeling chuffed by the prospect of her leaving, but I am trying to put on a brave face. This is one of the first upheavals I will have to face as part of the (post)-Covid world. It is for certain that I, and everyone else, will face many upheavals, the only question is how many and how wrenching. How does one prepare for the upheavals? It is difficult enough to prepare for known challenges, let alone unknown ones. I think the best one can do is cultivate a healthy relationships with oneself and with close ones. Work on relationships that you have ignored, try to strengthen existing ones. If someone holds a special place in your life, let them know in one way or the other. Don't wait for someone to reach out to you. If the person is or was a meaningful presence in your life, swallow your pride and reach out to them. That doesn't mean ping everyone in your facebook friend's list from college. It is okay to leave relationships dormant, but of which you have fond memories. Watch funny movies, sexy movies. Talk to people who make you laugh.

The Lives of Others

How does one look at the lives of others without jealousy, pity or indifference? Of course, our perceptions of others travel through many filters, some at their end and some at ours. But, is it possible to look at other people's lives with openness, curiosity and empathy? Resist the temptation to use them as a mirror to our own life? This is different from trying to see things from someone else's perspective, which I have no beef with. But, putting yourself in someone else's shoes is an effort we are not prepared to take for everyone we encounter. We only do it for people whose behaviour we are trying to understand. I am talking about the lives of peoples we are not particularly invested in. They could be acquaintances or even characters in a TV show or a book. Is it possible to see them for who they are instead of fitting them into the pre-existing categories of our own mind? 

Muscle Atrophy

Its amazing how quickly unused muscles atrophy, I decided to go for a run this morning on my usual route. Usual may not be the right word in this case. I run less than 10 times a year, and haven't run since I got back from India six months ago. But, this route is very pleasant and has enough uphill sections so that I have got a good enough workout in less than 30 minutes.I knew my legs would feel like jelly the following day bit I hadn't expected to struggle as much as I did today. And then it struck me that I hadn't cycled in more than a month and that my home workouts are focussed on my upper body. Two weeks ago, I got a shock when I shaved my face as I discovered that I had put on weight. I am trying to eat healthier since then. After what happened today, I have decided to add some uphill cycling to my exercise routine.
Sometimes I wonder if I am paying too much attention to my health (and let's be honest, to my physique) than I am to my PhD. My PhD progress has been slow and fitful, so maybe I should worry about it more. On the other hand, it strikes me that time hasn't been hanging heavy during this lockdown. My days are full even if I am not being as productive as I would like. I shouldn't diminish this achievement even as I try to squeeze more out of my days. I have a daily routine more or less set but I can always tweak it. 

The Point of It

One thing that I and several fellow PhD are often pondering about these days is the  point of our research in a world consumed and changing before our eyes? Having given it much thought, I can answer at length. Firstly, it is the height of conceit to imagine that we can drop what we do and pivot our research towards Covid. There are researchers who specialize in different aspects of this epidemic and this is their moment to shine. Secondly, the social, political and economic ramifications will outlive the virus itself. All social scientists will have a role to play in interpreting and making sense of the post-Covid world. Thirdly, our experiences over the last two months and going ahead into the pandemic, will inform our research even it is not related to Covid. Crises are demystifying moments, which is why scientists of all manner study them so closely. Lastly, if nothing else, my research gives me a sense of purpose and meaning to my life and that is important to me and to my mental well-being