Why Take the Long Shots

There is this job opening that I couldn't make up mind whether to apply for. About a week ago, I had tentatively decided not to. But, today, which happened to be the deadline of the job application, I decided to give it a go. I went on the jobs portal and to my horror, discovered that the job opening wasn't live nay longer. I spent the next hour kicking myself for not applying earlier, while acknowledging that even if I was planning to apply, I would have waited till the last day to send the application in. In which case, I would have missed to deadline. I decided to exercise to take my mind off it, and come up with ways to answer the question "What if that job had been the one?". In my defense, how was I to know that they meant the deadline was the start of 25th February and not the end? Suddenly, it occurred to me to check the university's website, and as luck would have it, the job was still live there. I decided to leave everything and write my application. Obviously, the job is not a great fit, else I wouldn't have vacillated about applying. There are many reasons why people take long shots. I am the type of person prone to "what-ifs" and "if-onlys". My reason for applying was self-preservation. Rather than being consumed by regret, might as well bung in an application. And, today I felt cheerful after ages, mainly because I was too busy to dwell on the genocide in Gaza. Distraction and diversion are underrated self-preservation tools.  And, there is something freeing about taking long shots. There is no weight of expectations and also the feeling of empowerment that comes with taking a chance.